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ohsheluhh:

I miss you when I am alone in my room late at night when I should be sleeping.

Typical.

I will always write down the times where I am missing you so bad.

…because that would be much better than contacting you. I need to remain headstrong. I need to move on from you. I do so well in the day time. I do so well when I am with him. I am actually happy.

…but you…sometimes you’ll sneak in my head. It’s just worse around this time of night.

(via ohsheluhh-deactivated20120328)

I keep going back to you and I guess we get further and further each time and each time I pray we make it through because you’re it, you’re the one. I need you because I love you and I could never give up on you.
We’re doing so good right now but I don’t wanna think about how long or rather short it would be this time. I just want to enjoy the times we spend together. I know if you just gave me a chance I can make you happy so you should know that if you get tired of me I’ll carry you, and if you can’t handle the pressure I will take them away and if you ever want to give up I will never let you. You may be blinded by stuff but I’m gonna keep at this until you see how perfect I am for you. When you are ready to open your eyes you will see me patiently waiting for you.

I miss you so much. I just want to give in and tell you how much I just want to lay next to you and hear you breathing. I’m on vacation, I was in a car driving 3,000 miles across the world, I’m in Vegas; my favorite place in the world. I’m living my fucking life right now but nothing even matters because all I really want to do is take a walk with you in this beautiful weather in this beautiful city with your hand in mine.
Forty-six days. It feels like forever. Everyone even believes I’m over you because like I said I’m living it up but nobody sees that I stay up at night because I can’t stop thinking about you and nobody sees when I fight back tears with a smile or a hearty laugh, nobody sees that nothing about me is okay. All I want to do is call you to hear your voice and tell you that I love you and that when I said forever I meant it. Nobody knows that I’m still waiting for you.
My heart is so heavy I wish that you would just let me love you or that I can just fall out of this love either one will do because quite frankly I don’t think I can ever be fully happy if neither of those things happen. I wish I didn’t love you so much because obviously I’m not enough for you. Ugh you don’t deserve this and neither do I but nothing is gonna change…

You’re happy now right, I love you like no one I’ve ever loved but I’m just a girl in love with another girl. When a guy loves his girl he’s a keeper but if I’m faithful I guess its just no biggie huh? You make me feel so empty…even after a terrific day it doesn’t keep my mind off of you. You’re still the last thought on my mind before I slip into my dreams, my quiet time for peaceful thoughts are always interrupted by memories of you, even after all this pain I feel you are still the first person I wish to wake up to every morning. Is this right?
See I know you are no saint and kind of a bitch. And trust me I know I deserve way better and can do way better but it just hurts and I’m empty.
I love you more than anybody ever will so do I fight for you or let you go? I miss you so much.